this is why I blog.

I stumbled upon Claire Marie’s wonderful blog, ‘Mamushka Marie’ today. And came across a post on “Why we blog”. I just want to keep going on about what ‘inspires’ me—haha. So, here I am, INSPIRED.

Claire Marie

She says
When I first traversed into the world of blogging, I really didn't know what I was in for, nor did I have a clue where to start. Not long ago, I was the girl, alone in her apartment, scouring the pages of your blogs for hours, gleaning, soaking in the inspiration that you and everyone else seemed to have so much of. I could sit there for days, sipping tea and melting over photos of Bridgette Bardot, Jeanne Moreau and the like. Although I felt (and I confess, even now sometimes feel) anything I would do would be second string to the brilliance before me, I thought, what the hell, it's now or never, and Mamushka Marie was born. I feel like I'm still in the critical preliminary stages, where if I wanted, I could through in the towel, nothing gained? nothing lost? Although I'm loving the great big blogosphere from where I sit, part of me still feels a bit amiss. In the sea of blogs, the pages and pages of outfits and ensembles, whats one more blog, what is it that sets us apart? Why do we blog? I guess for me it all started when things changed. I changed and life changed. Not too long ago, I was a California girl with a head full of dreams, a cat, a pretty decent job and an amazing home. The stress on amazing. We (my boyfriend and a set of close friends) rented an old craftsman house in the heart of Hillcrest San Diego CA. Surrounded by like minded friends and acquaintances, I felt like I was on my way...somewhere. One day however, everything changed. My wants and desires became more simple and I started to flirt with the idea of moving back home (to Wisconsin). Never before would the thought have crossed my mind. I mean Hey - I had it all, sort of. In order for my new found dream to come to fruition, a pit stop was to be made, in Texas. We moved here the summer of 2008, and what was meant to be a couple month stint in the lone star state has turned into a year plus. When we first arrived, culture shock hit me like a ton of bricks. I went from corner stores and coffee shops a walk down the way, boutiques and art galleries at my beck and call to concrete and suburban sprawl. I went from farmers markets and flower shops, the ocean breeze and architecture to Albertson's and Wal-mart, to TJ Maxx, and Dollar General. I wanted to leave the moment we arrived.If I hadn't learned this lesson before hand, (the grass isn't always greener one) I was sure to learn it this time, and a year later, I think its safe to say I have. That rug of constant indecisiveness always being pulled out from underneath me, I have put myfoot down once and for all and just let life happen. I've been afraid a lot of my life, afraid to put it all out there, to let myself just, be myself. And perhaps I was hiding in California, in my cozy little nook where nothing really went wrong but nothing really went anywhere. I rocked the boat this time, said goodbye to childhood fantasies and fears and saw that reality was a whole lot more inspiring and beautiful once I simply let it happen.Starting this blog was a way for me to reach out to that great big world that I used to be too afraid to touch. I could have stayed the fly on the wall, stood at a distance and watched the scenes play out before me, or I could take center stage, no matter how frightening it was, and read my lines, the ones I've written and memorized.This is why I blog. I blog because it's a way for me to connect to the world, in a place where some days I feel very alone. I blog because it's an exercise in boldness and the more I do it, the better it gets. I blog because I can and because just wearing the clothes is not enough.


Yes, I could just direct you to her page (which I will anyway). But, I wanted these wonderful words on my page too! So, shortly after I read this post, I started cleaning, which led me to finally organizing my little studio space. I am beyond excited about this. I now have a space to get out my sewing machine, draw, paint, and explore my creativity. For far too long I have had all my crafting things boxed up. Which led me to start thinking about “why I blog”. I blog because I love the internet. I blog because I’m a very visual person. I blog because I want to find more people/friends like me. I blog because I want to remember things. I blog because I want my daughter or son to look back at the archives and really understand their mom. I blog because I want to see myself evolve as a person. I blog because.. Well, the list could go on forever. So, reading that post made me sit back and think. Am I going to be the person who sits back and watches things pass me by? Or am I going to be the one creating, the one doing, and the one inspiring others? I know that I have a lot to work on and I know not every day will be a ‘good’ blogging day. Now, I think I’m just rambling and I have the urge to go on a huge tangent (because I love tangents)—I went to church last Sunday and the pastor said “We’re not a church that has it all figured out…” and it went on.. but to keep this tangent short. That statement really stuck in my head. I’m not someone who has it all figured out. I’m just someone with a need to give this blog a real ‘go’. So, here goes nothin'.

That tangent led me to the point. Thank you tangent!

Love, Angella

PS. Dilyana, I know I am taking up a majority of the sun room. I will make this up to you! I will do your hair/makeup anytime you want, with no complaints. Also, feel free to get crafty too my lady!

all words in green are written by Claire Marie.
her blog-http://mamushkamarie.blogspot.com/