life: on the go

1. work

2. daily cup

3. focus

4. chocolate malt

5. his face

unspectacular but SPECTACULAR

waking up with your arms around me

life felt safe

enjoying a cup of coffee before work

life felt warm

work

life felt chaotic

the train ride home

the feeling of the day's wear and tear along my bones

cleaning the apartment a little

life felt cold

talking to you before sleep

safe. warm. happy.

as i drink my cold coffee and reflect on the day that is now the past. i didn't accomplish too much. but, enough. each day is spectacular without actually being spectacular. each day i am one step closer to becoming. becoming whole.

and..

dear you,

all this quietness, only means one thing, happiness.

a lot of things will be changing around here at lavender and honey. this past year i have learned more about myself. i have learned that i care more about other people and their happiness before i even stop to think about myself. all the sadness has now vanished (well, not all, but most of it). for awhile i was just hanging on by a string and just existing. i was comfortable with that. the hurting. the sadness. so accepting of being walked on. i didn't want to have happiness because it felt unreachable after all these years. after losing my mom, not being able to attend school, attending cosmetology school and having it be a pretty bad experience overall.. and being alone without really being alone. well, it has left me with feeling comfortable with being sad. i wound't take back those experiences because they have shaped me into the person i am today. and who am i today you ask?

well, today, i am happier. i am enrolled in school again. i have a special someone (that might be the sweetest person in this world). i am excited for everything that is ahead. and really guys, really. this is real. AND. big things are coming.

love,

angella

ps

things are going to start feeling whole around here. just wait.

full and whole

i'm always talking about finding substance. talking about becoming full, whole, something more. i'm always thinking that i'm not living but merely existing. i'm always feeling a little uneasy, like i'm one step behind the rest. i'm always seeing the potential of myself and thinking that's enough. but, that's not enough. i want to be.

today i am half the person i want to be.

on some days i loose the vision of the other half of a person. but, today, i sought out the other half. i was productive. i got inspired. i felt whole again.

also, one step is better than two.

photo: taken with my phone

finding substance

Thoughts jumbled up:

I want to be interesting (to myself and others) and I want to have substance. Lately, I have been putting myself down again (in my mind). I really wish I would stop doing that. It's really tampering with my spirit. I am only human (I have to keep saying in my head). ONE DAY AT A TIME. Things will really, really be okay, in the end. Where is this end? Why do I want to get there so bad. It's all silly to me. This life.. this journey, so silly. But, I do want, I want a lot. I want to be full. Full of life. Full of information. Full of love. Full of hope. Full of dreams. Full of experiences. Full of the need to give. Full of everything else in between.

photo- not mine! if you want credit, please let me know!

I'm on my way

Inspire me, Monday.

flowers always makes me smile.

i'm on my way.

hanging in there.

life at the moment

whoa. where does the time go? i always have this feeling at the end of each month. what did i do and what goals did i reach, if any. at the end of april i didn't have that feeling though. i didn't reflect at all. i didn't get inspired and filled with happiness for a new month. for a fresh start. there was/is nothing. it's now may 2nd and i'm left with a feeling that i've really never experienced before, maybe something good will come from this month? since my expectations are low. OR maybe this kind of thinking will scare me into accomplishing something. i'm hopeful.

counting the moments

A whole week has gone by since my last update. Oh dear. I've been working by day and hanging out with friends by night. It's been nice. Although, I have missed my alone time. I really do just like being alone.. reminiscing, drinking cups of tea, drawing, and just being. The quietness of it all. It's kind of wonderful. Is this a bit selfish?

I'm sorry.

Scared. Awakened. Forgetfulness. Cappuccinos. Napping. Friends. Ideas. Five pairs of shoes. A football sweater. An ear to ear smile. A happy heart. Coconut Mocha—mmmm. A new beginning coming soon!

a breath of fresh air

So I didn’t really mean “remembering” to breath because it happens naturally but if it didn’t I would be in some kind of trouble. Speaking of trouble, I got another day off that was not supposed to happen, thank you weather. I actually would rather be working right now though.


Play List:
1 hot n cold katy perry
2 love story taylor swift
3 more adventurous rilo kiley
4 the absence of god rilo kiley
5 under the blacklight rilo kiley
6 tour self portrait sundowner
7 endless miles sundowner
8 do what you will chuck ragan
9 skinny boy amy millan
10 saeglopur sigur ros


I’ll do these playlist things every now and then. I love music! Rilo Kiley is a everyday must. Jenny Lewis’s voice is not only magical but she writes amazing lyrics. I don’t listen to Katy Perry or Taylor twift much but I suppose right now listening to different songs from what I usually prefer is I believe a breath of fresh air. Enjoy!

stay a night

I love discovering hotels that don’t actually look like them. Below are some unique spaces. The don't have that Run down, dirty, commercial like feeling to them.

The Bellinter House Hotel in Ireland

Hotel Fox in Copenhagen

Chic hotel bedroom in Spain

Jupiter Hotel in Oregon

life at the moment has been busy. I am enjoying it actually. I start school in March, my life is finally feeling like its on a track instead of off.